


The Name Game

by Grotesque (Grotesque_Flower)



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Aged up characters, Bill likes to annoy people but being annoyed in return not so much, M/M, Swearing, coffee shop AU, human!bill cipher, they're like 17 or 18 here idk
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-05-27
Updated: 2015-11-09
Packaged: 2018-04-01 12:06:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 14,999
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4019146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Grotesque_Flower/pseuds/Grotesque
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A new coffee shop opened in Gravity Falls while the twins were back home, when they get back Dipper finds himself in a sort of name war between him and the annoying barista that works there.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Just a really really awful quick story, reasoning? At the end notes.
> 
> EDIT: Why... why do you guys like this so much... I don't understand, i half-assed this

Dipper scrolled through his mp3 as he finished zipping up his light jacket, despite it being the middle of summer the mornings in Gravity Falls were still a bit cold. Coming from the teenager who was still wearing shorts as he currently searched for a song to listen to as he walked into town.

Singing along to some Lady Gaga song, alright shut up her music was catchy, under his breath he walked down the sidewalk, a car every now and again would drive past him but he paid no mind. The morning sun just barely peeking over the tall trees and mountains of the small town, casting long shadows of lingering night while illuminating everything in a gold glow.

He took his time as he rounded a corner, struggling with sleep all night and simply deciding that once the sun came out he would run down to the newly built coffee shop to help him stay awake. That was one thing he sure did get excited about, hearing from Pacifica over a skype call between her and his sister that they had finally built a coffee shop in Gravity Falls while they were still in the last few months of school. The first evening they got off the bus, waiting for Mabel to stop her bear hug on the blonde before he asked her where the coffee place was.  Savoring every sip of the hot beverage as he walked back to the shack that evening, finally a summer of actually decent coffee on days he didn’t want to have several energy drinks, no offense to the small dinner but their brewed coffee definitely was an acquired taste that he would never have.

This was the second time he’d come in, in some sense he was excited to see who would all be working there, see the people who would probably come to memorize all of his orders over time. Pausing the song he was on and taking out his left earbud he opened the single glass door to the small shop. A bell rang through the place as he looked around once again. It was a pretty nice place, a relaxing and smooth atmosphere. He wasn’t the only one in there, Toby was sitting in the far corner as he scribbled down notes of some sort.

Leisurely he walked up to the counter, looking around for someone who worked there. He leaned all the way over the counter, to look past the display cases of random sweets and what not. When he stood back on the floor he turned slightly, his attention away from the counter as he was just about to call over to the newspaper reporter where the employees were before he heard a voice from behind him.

“Hello there!” An annoying voice cut through the silence causing Dipper to jump at the sudden scare.

“Oh my God!” the brunette jumped before he turned around to look at the employee.

The employee was tall, a little intimidating but whatever. He wore a bright smile that made his pale blue eyes seem to glow, his blond hair contrasted by the natural tan of the man. Dipper hadn’t even noticed he’d been staring for a moment before he came back to reality.

“You alright there kid?” The employee asked with a laugh at how the teenager seemingly needed a moment to catch his breath.

“You scared the hell out of me, Jesus Christ, where did you come from anyway, there was nobody behind the counter when I came in,” Dipper narrowed his eyes at the tall lanky employee, who continued to smile down at him.

“Right, right, anyway! What can I get you?” he asked eagerly, ignoring the question he had gotten.

Dipper looked from the nametag he was wearing and back up to his face before taking a step back to look up at the chalkboard with the list of specialty brews and whatnot, “Yeah, Bill, I’ll just have an Americano, large.”

“Do you me-“

“Don’t,” Dipper cut off the man before he could correct him on the size chart and the names, grabbing his wallet from his back pocket.

“Alright, what’s the name,” Bill asked with a slight roll of his eyes.

“There’s nobody else here, really?” Dipper looked at him with a raised brow.

“Protocol,” the tall man shrugged with a smile still, causing Dipper to roll his eyes.

“It’s Dipper.”

After a few minutes the blond slide the finished order over a particularly tall portion of the counter, to be more exact he set it atop of one of the display cases, a laughing smile visible through his eyes as he peered over to see the scowl Dipper had gave him as he stretched to get his drink.

Dipper didn’t even bother with his music as he left without a ‘thank you’ towards the annoying employee, “have a good day, Dipper~!!”

Dipper rolled his eyes as he took a sip of his still too hot drink, biting his tongue a bit as he stared down at the drink to the sidewalk ahead of him before doing a double take to look down at the writing. In sloppy yet neat black sharpie was written “Skipper.”

Dipper took a moment in though, rolling his eyes with an annoyed sigh, shaking his head, “okay?”

Dipper fumbled with the door of the shack before shoving it open with his shoulder, as he removed his keys from the lock his older twin poked her head from the kitchen to look at him.

“Well, well,” Mabel spoke as she waltzed out, still wearing her long pink shirt that went to her knees, her multicolored shorts peeking barely from underneath, “and where were you out so early?”

Instead of a verbal reply Dipper simply pointed to his coffee, shutting the door and walking to the table to take a seat. Taking notice in the random assortment of bowls of varying sizes, flour already out along with several other ingredients.

“What are you making?” He asked as he took a long drink of his coffee, eyeing the mess before looking over to Mabel.

“Mabel Cakes~!!!” she sang before skipping over to the counter, “look what Pacifica got for me!!”

The female twin grabbed the small pink basket from the counter before bringing it to the table to show her younger brother. Dipper raised a brow as he looked in the basket, an assortment of small bottles with glitter in them, each bottle containing a different color.

“Glitter?” he questioned, unamused and to be honest, a bit confused.

“Not just glitter! Edible glitter!” Mabel squealed happily as she hugged the basket close to her, twirling over to the counter again to continue making breakfast, “So, how’s the coffee?”

“Fine, good actually, aside from the annoying barista and how he misspelled my name,” Dipper flicked his coffee cup lightly as he looked at the miswritten tag of his name.

“What? What did he write?” Mabel asked curiously, looking over her shoulder.

“Skipper,” the younger turned the cup so that the writing was facing his sister.

Mabel bit her tongue from giggling, “Okay, simple mistake, maybe it was just busy.”

“I was the only one there, well Toby was there but he was in his own little world, but it was the exact opposite of busy,” Dipper pointed out.

“Well, maybe he was tired?” Mabel shrugged, holding the bright red spatula in her hand as she focused back to the stovetop.

“He knew what my name was, there was no ‘he misheard’ ‘he was busy’ ‘tired’ or whatever,” he sighed before taking another drink of his coffee.

“Hm, well whatever, I wanna go over there later!” Mabel cheered as she flipped one of the pancakes she was making. Dipper simply hummed as he waited for her to finish the first patch of these Mabel Cakes.

* * *

 

“Hello~” Bill turned around at the sound of the bell jingling, “Oh~, you’re back, and you brought a friend?”

Dipper ignored the blonde. Mabel rushed over to the display case of sweets as she stared at them with wide eyes and an equally wide smile. Dipper stood next to her, out of the way as other costumers came into the shop and placed their orders. Mabel was looking over each and every sweet they had for today, while Dipper was reading over the coffee and beverage options.

After the costumers had left with their drinks Bill walked over to where the twins were standing, his head tilted in slight confusion, “So… Are you two, like, what are you two? You look related…”

“We’re twins,” Dipper spoke bluntly, his eyes never leaving the chalkboard overhead.

“Okay, well I mean, like,” Bill trailed off, he rolled his wrist with a slight grimace as he tried to find the right words.

Dipper looked down at the blond with narrowed eyes, “Are, are you asking if we’re like, dating or something.”

“This is a small town you’d be surprised what goes on in small towns,” Bill raised his hands up in defense, Dipper’s expression made him worry that the younger was about to leap over the counter and punch him.

“I have a girlfriend~!!!” Mabel perked up slightly to add her comment before eyeing the red velvet cookies.

“Oh thank god,” Bill spoke loudly under his breath, “And what about you short stack?”

Dipper’s scowl never faltered as he stared down the tall man, “You’re an awfully nosey.”

“Small chat kid, besides, I’m a very curious person,” Bill smiled down at him as he leaned against the counter.

“Right, anyway, Mabel do you know what you want?” Dipper brushed off the question as he looked over to his sister.

Mabel looked up at Dipper before standing back to look at the menu, seconds later she already knew what beverage she wanted. Leaning against the counter as she spoke what she wanted, “Okay, okay, you guys can customize these drinks, right?”

“Yea-“

“Awesome!!” Mabel cut Bill off, “So give me a mocha, large or whatever the largest cup you got, okay? Add some vanilla syrup into that, caramel and chocolate too! Oooh, you have some peppermint? Oh wait nah, not the syrup. So add all that, and then some chocolate chips, now I know what you’re thinking, won’t they melt? I don’t care just stick ‘em in there. And then, whipped cream oh good lord, just as much as you can, I don’t need a lid on my drink, just add the whipped cream, then add some chocolate powder, can you do that? Oh wait! Do you guys have some of that edible glitter stuff? That would be awesome, oh who am I kidding you guys probably don’t so, uhmmm, yeah! Just do the chocolate powder stuff, maybe even some chocolate curls or something, oh and chips! We need the chocolate chips again! Drizzle some more caramel and chocolate on the whipped cream, you got those peppermint candies? Crushed up and sprinkle them on top maybe? Or are those a seasonal thing? Oh well, I guess I’ll have to do with the rest. And that’s what I want, oh! And could I get some of those croissants with the chocolate in them?”

Bill stared from the wide smiling girl to Dipper, a worried look on his face. Dipper just shook his head before speaking, “We’re taking different orders, go ahead and make hers I can wait.”

Bill turned back to the female, “Right, name?”

“Mabel~!” She chirped as she bounced oh her heals, eagerly waiting her overly sugared concoction.

After several minutes Bill set the drink on the counter along with the small bag of sweets, Dipper taking note in how his sister’s name was written on the side, a capital M and no mistakes. Mabel paid for her drink and happily went over to the small table next to the entrance to wait for her sibling.

“Yeah, I’ll just get a regular coffee and just add some vanilla into it I guess,” Dipper sighed as he pulled out his wallet.

“What? Not as adventurous as your sister there?” Bill laughed as he looked over to Mabel, who was eating the whipped cream with her straw.

“No, I prefer not to die from an overabundance of sugar,” Dipper spoke as waited for the next question.

“Name?”

“Dipper,” his brown eyes narrowed up at the barista, who simply laughed an okay before turning to make his simple drink.

After paying Dipper barely had enough time to put his wallet back in his pocket before Mabel tugged his arm, “Come on! Pacifica says she wanted to join out mystery hunt today!”

Bill’s brow raised at the twins, and this so called ‘mystery hunt’.

“God!!! Dammit Mabel okay! Let me get my drink, Jesus!” Dipper scolded before reaching over and grabbing his drink.

Nearly at the Mystery Shack Dipper remembered what he wanted to check, looking down at his drink and twisted it till he found the scribbled writing.

“God fucking dammit…”

In sharpie, written against the cup was a two words labeling the owner of the drink, “Pine Tree.”

* * *

 

It had happened every time Dipper went to the coffee shop when Bill was on his shift, names written on the side such as; Piper, Ursa Minor, Flipper, Mystery Twin, and the list just goes on.

But today, oh today was the final straw, after telling Bill when he asked his name, he specifically said that it was Dipper Pines, and even spelled it out for him. But even still, when he looked at his drink he found the neat writing he has come to instantly know as Bill’s, was “Dinner Pipes.”

“I don’t know what to do Mabel, I’m just, I can’t deal with this why is it bothering me so much?” Dipper was sitting at the table, his hand against his forehead as he stared in thought at the table.

“I don’t know what to tell you bro, he’s just messing with you I guess, just confront him about it,” Mabel said as Pacifica was helping her roll some yarn they had bought earlier into balls.

“No! That’s what he wants, he wants me to confront him, he’ll get a kick out of it,” Dipper looked over to his sister with wide eyes. This whole ordeal had obviously gotten to him, no matter how petty it was.

“Now, I know you didn’t ask me for my two cents,” the blonde girl spoke as she untangled the pink yarn, “but why not just mess with him? Screw his name up, he knows you obviously know his name. You do. Just purposely mess it up casually. His name is freaking Bill, how hard can it be. Just call him Bill Nye the science guy.”

“Bill Nye the coffee guy,” Mabel snickered, receiving a snorted laugh from the blonde.

Dipper stared at the two in thought before smiling, “Yeah, yeah that might actually work!”

“You’re welcome,” Pacifica smiled to herself as she continued to spin the yarn into a ball, “if you’re going right now though, can you get me a chocolate chip mocha?”

“Yeah, sure, it’s on the house since you helped me out,” Dipper stood up as he walked to the door, slipping on his shoes.

“Woohoo, go me,” the blonde teen cracked her gum against her teeth as Dipper walked out of the house.

* * *

 

“Kid, should I at all be concerned by the sheer amount of coffee you get?” Bill laughed as he watched Dipper walk into the shop, his usually tense and annoyed aura seemingly relaxed.

“Will, the amount of coffee I drink is my business, besides, I am in a sense helping pay your paycheck,” Dipper laughed slightly as he notice the slight glare he was receiving.

Bill’s eyes narrowed at the teenager as he thought, _‘did he just call me Will…?’_

“Right,” the taller one spoke, “Do you know what you want?”

“Nah, give me a second Phil, okay?” Dipper bit his tongue to prevent himself from laughing. Pacifica you genius.

Bill shifted slightly as he locked his elbows, leaning on the counter, muttering under his breath, “Is this kid trying to fuck with me…?”

“What was that?” Dipper looked over at the annoyed look on the usually smiling man, “Sorry, Billy, did you say something to me?”

Bill took in a deep breath before sighing, a smile returning to his face as he stood up straight, “Nothing~! Just let me know when you’re ready, Pine Tree~.”

After a few moments Dipper stepped toward the counter, knocking on the surface as he called out for the blonde employee, “Alright, I’m ready to order d-“

“What would you like??” Bill cut him off as he raised his voice walking from one side of the counter to where Dipper was standing. Dipper looked up at him with a raised brow and a slight smile.

“Well, a chocolate chip mocha, and uhm, I guess just a plain black coffee for me, William,” Dipper smirked as he pulled out his wallet, keeping eye contact with the employee.

Bill smiled slightly and scoffed, “You see, that doesn’t work because you technically already used it when you called me Will. Oh, and name?”

“Dipper Pines,” the brunette smiled.

“Dickus Pines? Alright,” Bill nodded as he turned to get the two drinks, thanking in the back of his mind that nobody else was in the coffee shop right now to hear the remark.

Dipper leaned against the counter as he waited for Bill to get the drinks, smiling to himself as he looked around before the sound of the barista speaking caught his attention.

“You know, you’re never good at this whole name game thing, you should try harder next time, because really, kid, you don’t know what you’re getting into,” Bill smiled to himself, hearing the scoff from the teenager before he turned around with the two drinks and sliding them on the counter.

Dipper paid for the drinks and grabbed them, pushing open the door with his shoulder, calling out to the blonde as he watched him leave, “See ya later, Bill Nye the Coffee Guy~!!!”

Dipper laughed out loudly as he quickly turned the corner from the shop, barely catching the dirty look that Bill had given him at the last remark he, borrowed, from his sister.

* * *

 

“How did it go?” Mabel asked when Dipper walked through the door.

Dipper walked over to the two girls who were still in the kitchen, setting Pacifica’s order on the table next to her before taking his seat across from them before answering, taking a long drink of his coffee, a proud look on his face, “Personally? I think it went well, need to work on the names, I’ll have to make a list of all the possibilities though.”

“Boyfriend should be on there,” She giggled to herself, getting a dirty look from her brother.

“Wow, wow, wow, no,” Dipper pointed over at her with a scowl.

“Oh come on! It’s obvious you two like each other,” she put her yarn down in her lap as she looked over the table and at Dipper, “Bro, come on, I know flirting when I see it. I am the matchmaker, remember?”

“Like, one or two people have called you that, and he’s not someone I like, I just, enjoy bantering with him,” Dipper took another sip of his drink before setting on the table.

Mabel was about to say something before she tilted her head to the side, squinting slightly as she read the words written in marker on Dipper’s coffee, snorted a shocked laughed getting the attention of the other two.

“What?’ Pacifica grabbed his drink and pulled it towards her to read the writing, before her blue eyes widened as she raised her brows to look at Dipper with a smile, handing the drink back to him.

Dipper curiously turned over the cup to see what the other two thought were so funny, “that son of a BITCH!!! It is on!!!”

Dipper grabbed his drink as he marched upstairs to figure out some clever names and whatnot to call Bill the next time he came in for coffee, something to get him back for writing “Dipper Penis” on his coffee cup. He would not allow that annoying barista get the last laugh.

This meant war.


	2. Let the games begin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much awaited i assume from how you guys seemed to really enjoy the first chapter and the encouragement for another, here's the next chapter. Bill is a creep with a weird sense of humor.

Dipper sat at the head of his bed, several pillows propped up behind him, he quickly waved a pencil in the air as he stared in concentration at the random lined notebook page in his lap. He stared at the few words he had scribbled down in annoyance as if they rearranged themselves into some mocking name directed at himself. He groaned loudly as he tossed the notebook at the foot of his bed, pencil quickly following it but not quite in the same path as it slide behind the bed, causing the teen to groan once more and let his head hit the wooden attic wall with a thud, his blue and white hat knocking enough to barely stay on his head.

He stared blankly at the corner right above the door in thought. Seriously, how hard could this even be? He was smart enough to come up with names and dorky things to call that annoying barista down at the coffee place, he was just having an off day. Sliding his hand between him and the wall and pushing himself manually off the wall to the old desk right next to his bed, swiping the quarter empty now room temperature coffee, squinting at the inked intentionally misprinted name on it.

“Maybe if you wish hard enough that cup will come to life and help you,” A sudden voice grabbed Dipper’s attention, turning his head to the other who entered the room.

“You’re not funny, Pacifica,” the brunette set the coffee down on the desk as he leaned back against his pillows, staring over at the blonde as she stood in Mabel’s side of the room with her hand on her hip as she scanned the mess in search of something.

After a few seconds the blonde girl waved the hand that wasn’t resting on her pelvis in the air at him, “Never said I was, well, Mabel thinks I am. Speaking of her, where does she keep those loom things.”

“What?”

“You know, kinda looks like a rack with spokes on it, you can use them for knitting and things like that,” the girl looked over at him with her normal, bordering on bitch-face.

“I don’t know where my sister keeps anything,” Dipper leaned over and grabbed the notebook again, looking down for the pencil before remembering and glaring at nothing.

“And neither do I,” Pacifica sighed to herself before turning on her heels, watching the younger twin blindly search for the lost pencil with his arm buried between the bed and wall.

Pacifica walked over to his bed, grabbing the notebook and flipping through the pages of random notes and doodles, leaning against the bed frame as she crossed her legs slightly when she found the page she assumed was meant for the names the other had come up with, “Woah, making some serious progress, sure am glad I’m not on your bad side, you’d crush my self-esteem with your killer name calling skills.”

“Piss off,” Dipper scoffed as he rolled his eyes, leaning up with the pencil in hand and ripping the notebook out of the girl’s hands.

Pacifica held her hands up in defense, “Hey, I was gonna offer my help but not if you’re going to act like that, gotta be nice.”

“Oh yeah, like I’m gonna listen to you of all people on how to be nice,” the brunette retorted as he scooted back to the head of the bed, bringing his knees up enough for him to rest the notebook against them, “Seriously though, how are you so good at it?”

Pacifica moved from leaning against the bedpost to taking a seat on the edge of the other’s bed, staring off in thought as she rolled her wrist as she spoke, “I suppose it all goes back to the day on the beach, I was merely a young girl, when a boy the same age as little eight year old me, told me that my ponytail made the back of my head look like a horse’s ass, and now of course I didn’t like it so I turned around and took one glimpse at him and yelled ‘at least my FACE doesn’t look like a butt!’. And he ran off with tears in his eyes, it truly was a remarkable day of self-discovery.”

Dipper stared at the blonde at the foot of his bed with an indescribable expression, “What.”

The girl turned to him with a blank expression, “I’m kidding, I don’t actually know why I’m so good at it apparently, just am.”

“But did that really happened?”

“No, made it up on the spot,” a smile tugged at the girl’s lips as she watched Dipper shake his head.

“Yeah, I doubt that didn’t happen, that seems like something you’d do,” the boy sighed as he tapped the lead of the pencil on the blue lined paper, “this is so much harder than I thought…”

Pacifica snorted causing the other to look up at her, “If you want help, I’ll help you out, but I need to see the guy first.”

“I am not going back there right now,” Dipper cut her off as he spoke with a flat and serious tone.

“I know that,” she quipped, “Geez, let people finish. Tomorrow morning when I get here in the morning we’ll go down there together, he works tomorrow morning right?”

“I think so,” Dipper replied, trying to cover up the fact that there was not ‘I think’ involved, Dipper had come to memorize a few of the barista’s work schedules, one of them included opening in the morning.

“Alright good, I’ll help you out then, for now, I need to go find out where exactly those looms are,” Pacifica slapped her knees and stood up, tugging her skirt down out of habit before leaving the room, leaving Dipper to use the time between now and the morning to come up with hopefully a few more names.

* * *

 

Dipper sat on the old splintering wood of the front steps, his bony elbow digging into the flesh of his thigh as he cradled his chin in his hand, staring incredibly bored down at his phone screen as he moved two different colored gemstones to make a match on the game. His attention was caught as he looked away from the screen to look up at the blonde teen walking up the dirt path, rocks shifting under her weight as she walked with her hands shoved into her jean short pockets.

Dipper didn’t budge and instead waited for her to walk all the way to him, her dark blue eyes staring down at him through heavily mascara coated lashes, “You ready to go get that guys number?”

“What the hell,” The look on the brunettes face changed from boredom to annoyance in a quick second after the words left the girls lips.

Pacifica quietly chuckled as she shook her head slightly, “You’re too easy to bother, Mabel is right.”

“Yeah, well stop allowing Mabel’s humor to rub off on you, I already have to deal with her turning everything into some sort of weird Summer Romance thing, I don’t need you to do that as well,” Dipper stood up from the steps, dusting off his shorts before putting his phone away.

“I prefer to stick to my own personal romances than deal with others, it’s exhausting, but your sister has a kindred heart and just likes to see others happy with another,” the teen girl turned on her heels, already taking lazily long strides down the nonexistent driveway of the Mystery Shack.

The walk down into town was quick, filled with light chatter that would be completely forgotten before the day was done. Pacifica reached into her back pocket and grabbed her phone, unlocking the screen and pulling up Dipper’s contact, mindlessly sending him a text as they walked down the sidewalk.

“Are you serious,” she stopped in her tracks as she heard the faint but growing in volume excerpt from a song that the younger twin had decided to use for her contact ringtone on his own phone.

Dipper stopped, sighing deeply as he tried not to laugh and be serious as his phone continued to ring, “It’s, it’s a very suiting song, you are a rich bitch, and it’s the only thing that reminds me of you.”

“Why am I helping you,” Pacifica rolled her eyes as Dipper grabbed his phone, unlocking it and cutting the song off, “You’re turning your phone on vibrate in there.”

“Yeah, finding out that I listen to Nicki Minaj would probably just help him pick things to call me, or just make fun of me for,” he spoke as he looked down to read the text the girl had just sent him, simply stating that she’d text him things for him to call the barista while they were there.

The duo stepped into the small coffee shop, Dipper holding the glass door open for the other whose nose was in her phone as she walked into the shop, taking a look around before staring back at her screen.

“Why hello there, Pinus pumila~,” Bill poked his head out from the door leading to the back behind the counter, his lips pulling into a smile as he waltz to the register, leaning his elbows on the dark marble countertop and cradling his chin on the backs of his hands as he locked his fingers together.

“What did you just call me,” Dipper was taken back slightly at the name, only knowing what the first part meant. Walking up till he was about a foot or so from the counter, Pacifica walking up to stand next to him her gaze never leaving her phone yet.

Bill’s smiling gaze went from Dipper to the girl standing closely to him, his smile slipping slightly to a false happiness as his visible eye scanning her before he spoke, “she with you?”

The male teen looked over at Pacifica before back to the menu, “Yeah.”

Pacifica’s blue eyed gaze looked up to accidentally lock with pale blue ones, Bill’s smile gone as he stare dully at her before she nervously tightened her jaw and looked back down to her phone. Dipper felt the faint buzz from his phone in his hand, pulling it up before biting his lip in attempt not to snicker or smile. Dropping his hand back to his side before sighing as he scanned over the menu.

“So, Bilbo, what’s the coffee special for today?” Dipper asked as he blankly stared at the tall man who decided to stop leaning on the counter and stand up straight.

“Don’t know yet, we just opened,” Bill shrugged as he instead leaned on one of the counters on the wall behind him, crossing his long legs and crossing his arms over his work uniform shirt, staring blankly at the random assortments stocked below the counter.

“You don’t know yet you work here?” Dipper questioned with a scoffed.

“Nope.”

Dipper rolled his eyes and continued to look at the menu, feeling his phone go off again before reading the text, “So Till, tell me, is the red velvet mocha as good as the company makes it out to be?”

Bill looked over at Dipper who had just finished reading the text on his phone, “Don’t know, I never tried it.”

Pacifica looked up at Bill while his attention was on the other, scanning the tall man before his attention turned to her, quickly looking back down at her phone as she texted Dipper once again. A few moments later and Dipper was reading at his phone again, trying to hide a smile as he went back to reading the menu waiting a bit before speaking.

“Alright, Billie Wonka-“

“You cheater.”

“What?” Dipper looked back down from the menu to look at the blonde barista.

Bill shook his head as he laughed, “You little cheater!”

The brunette scoffed as he rolled his eyes, trying to swallow down any emotion from being called out, “I have no idea what you’re talking about, what am I ch-“

Bill slammed his hands on the register countertop a bit too harshly, easily leaning over as he stared wide eyed from Pacifica to Dipper and back, laughing through his teeth, “you are, CHEATING, my dear.”

Bill gaze stayed on Pacifica, his visible eye staring through her almost as Pacifica stood awkwardly in place, feeling uncharacteristically uncomfortable.

Dipper awkwardly laughed, “Bill, I don’t know what you’re talking about, cheating? How are we, i mean me, how am I cheating? And at what anyway?”

Bill hung his head as he laughed before quickly whipping it back up as he looked at Dipper, pointing at Pacifica, “I’m not dumb, she’s texting you the names you’re saying! You two aren’t clever…”

On the last word his gaze went back to Pacifica, narrowing his gaze dangerously almost, his smile fading slightly as he cocked his visible eyebrow at her.

“Mabel called me and says I need to come home right now immediately, good luck Dipper with your game,” Pacifica quickly spoke as she hurriedly sprinted towards the door, pushing it open and taking a mad dash down the block till she felt she was far enough away.

“COWARD!” Dipper yelled after her, staring at the door before sighing.

“She’s a coward, you’re a cheater, well you’re both cheaters, perfect for each other it seems like, looks like I win,” Bill sighed as he laid on the counter top, his arms dangling over the edge, “Because you’re an awful, awful at cheating, cheater.”

“Yeah, well it wasn’t even an official game or anything, so who cares, besides if I really wanted to I could totally outwit you with names and what not, I just have more important things to do rather than sit around coming up with dorky names to call someone, like you,” Dipper scoffed a laugh as he crossed his arms over his chest, leaning against the counter.

“Hmm, is that a challenge?” the barista questioned, looking up at the younger with a curious glint in his eyes, “Maybe even a bet?”

The brunette rolled his eyes, “maybe it is, no, it is a challenge! I bet I could outwit you in a game of names!”

“You sure you want to do that, short stack? If you cheat, I would have to KILL YOU,” Bill’s face split into a wide toothy smile, showing unnaturally pointed canines that made Dipper’s blood chill for a moment, Bill looked at the horrified look on the other’s face before letting out a loud and obnoxious cackled.

“Heh, yeah, like you would,” Dipper swallowed down the unease as he tried to play it off as nothing, staring boredly over to the door again.

After moments of silence he turned his attention back to the blonde, who was looking up at him with a blank expression and wide eyes, “What.”

“I could kill you if I wanted to, by certain laws if one is found out to be lying they could be punished by death,” the man spoke with a low tone, never breaking eye contact with the teen.

“Are… Are you serious…?” Dipper swallowed once again as he stared down at him, his brows knitted in confusion and worry.

Painful silence before the blonde broke through with laughter, letting his head fall against his forearm as he choked on his amusement, “oh my God, kid! You should’ve seen you, your face! Hahaha, oh my God that was priceless man I wish I had a camera or something that was hilarious.”

“You are such a fucking weirdo!” Dipper yelled as he shoved himself off of the counter to put space between the man and himself.

“Oh I’m not so bad once you get to know me,” Bill sighed with faint laughter as he pulled himself up enough to lean once again on his elbows, a lazy smile on his face.

“Yeah, I’d rather not,” the teen spoke with an annoyed groan, glaring at the smiling blonde.

Bill slid off the counter to stand straight up again, brushing the left part of his golden hued bangs out of his face while the rest stayed and covered one of his eyes, running his fingers through the rest, “So, did you just come here to try, and emphasis on try, to out name me? Or was there something you needed?”

“Just get me a plain black and I’m out of here,”  Dipper walked up to the counter carefully as he watched the barista move to make the simple drink, he already came to know that the teen always wanted the largest drink cup they offered.

He came back a few minutes later, taking the card that was handed to him and quickly swiped it through the slot before handing it back after being authorized, “So, what do you say though? Care to bet?”

“What are the stakes?” Dipper asked as he shoved his wallet back into his vest pocket, staring at the other.

“Hmm, we’ll get there when we get there! Nothing too extreme, and because you’re not a fun guy murder is out if you cheat, if you cheat you gotta pay for a slot in one of the more popular newspapers and exclaim how awesome I am, well I mean whoever wasn’t the cheater of course,” Bill’s smile widened as he held out his hand towards the other.

Dipper’s brown eyes narrowed slightly, studying the other’s tan face before slapping his hand into a handshake, “Fine, it’ll make the summer less boring. It’s a bet!”

“Let the games begin, Little Dip.” Bill’s grip tightened slightly before pulling away and handing the drink to the other, who quickly pulled it out of his grasp and turned to leave without another word.

After leaving and taking several steps down the sidewalk he looked at the side of the cup, carefully written in sharpie were two words, “good luck.”

He scoffed as he brought the hot beverage to his lips and taking a drink.

* * *

 

Dipper opened the door to his and Mabel’s shared room carefully, looking over to his sister’s bed to see her lying sprawled out like a starfish and Pacifica lazily sleeping semi atop of her. He walked over to his bed and grabbed one of the many pillows before he walked carefully over to the two girls sleeping. Bringing the object back and then quickly bringing it down on the blonde girl.

The girl’s eyes snapped open, blurrily and unfocused for a moment as she gaped, her blonde hair knocked in her face as she held her hand over where the pillow had hit her, sitting herself up on her knees. Mabel sat up on her elbows before pulling herself from underneath the girl.

“What the shit Dipper!?” Pacifica growled out as she pushed back her hair to get a better look at the teen, who was simply standing there taking a drink of his coffee.

“Thanks for bailing out on me, very appreciated,” he spoke between sips.

Pacifica leaned back on he hands as she unfolded her legs to kick at the other, her teeth clenched together in anger. When Dipper simply jumped back out of her leg’s reach she began climbing off the bed only to have Mabel’s arms wrap around her torso and pulling her back against the wall.

“What is going?” Mabel questioned looking from Pacifica to her brother, her arms still carefully wrapped around the girl who huffed in annoyance.

“Your girlfriend is a coward that bails out on everything.”

“Your brother is a complete idiot that cannot think for himself and needs help from others without appreciation!”

“Oh, I’d rather be that than run away anytime something gets tough!” Dipper moved his arms outward as he spoke, mindlessly stepping closer to the bed only to be swiped at again by the blonde’s legs.

“Oh well at least I don’t take cheap shots when someone is asleep,” she rolled her blue eyes, her hands going to the arms around her to push at them.

“Ugh! You two!!” Mabel raised her voice just below a yell, the two stopping and looking over at her, “What are you two arguing about?”

“Dipper needed my help to name-call that barista, because he’s not clever enough to think of even the simplest of things!” Pacifica turned her attention towards Dipper with a glare.

“Yeah well,” Dipper had to pause to think for a moment, the blonde girl snorting a laugh at him as he did so, “at least I’m not so much of a jerk that being one is so easy to me, like a talent!”

Pacifica raised her brows but before she could quip back Mabel squealed directly in her ear, pulling her close out of habit.  
“Dipper!! You mean Bill!!” She smiled widely at her twin.

He sighed annoyed as he ran his hand through his hair, “Mabel, it went awful because SOMEONE ran away! A-”

“Pacifica you were being a wing-woman??” Mabel questioned, her gaze curious as she looked at Pacifica.

“A what? No!” the blonde girl wriggled around in the grip slightly, Mabel loosened it enough to be able to haul her back if she decided to try and lunge and attack Dipper.

“I wasn’t there to flirt or whatever with him Mabel! I was there to get back at him!” Dipper spoke up, despite drinking caffeine and only spending less than ten minutes with Mabel he was getting exhausted.

“You know bro, some people do flirt through name calling~ and being mean~!” Mabel sung as she laid back down against the bed, pulling the other girl down with her.

“Yeah, well I wasn’t flirting with him, to flirt with someone you have to actually like them like that-“

“So you do like him~! Well, at least in some sort of way,” the older twin mused with a smile, causing him to sigh once again.

“Oh my God it is too early for this, I’m going downstairs,” Dipper turned away, tossing his pillow back onto his bed as he grabbed the notebook on the desk and a pen before heading out the door.

“You’re not denying that you like him~!!!” Mabel laughed loudly, Pacifica snorting as they heard him groan out of frustration all the way form downstairs.

Mabel moved around to lay on her side, facing the other, whispering quietly as if Dipper was still upstairs and in earshot, “How did it go anyway? Did it go well? How was Dipper? How was Bill?”

Pacifica hushed her, simply moving closer to push her face against the brunette’s shoulder in a weak attempt to get her to move onto her back. When she did so Pacifica laid her head on her collar bone, wrapping her arms around the other before sighing through her nose, “Look, I’m gonna be neutral on whether Dipper is crushing or not, so I’ll just say he’s utterly clueless either way, whether he’s trying to flirt or just be mean or whatever it is he’s trying to do.”

Mabel hummed in conclusion, “Denial at its finest, convincing others as well as himself.”

Pacifica simply chuckled instead of a true response, snuggling closer to the other as she began to fall back to sleep. Mabel on the other hand laid with a wide smile, staring at the ceiling as she thought about the two, trying her best not to squeal and disturb the girl dozing off.

Denial at its finest.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> keep the names coming you guys! I really couldn't have done this chapter without the help from all of you! My computer has been acting up lately so please bear with me. Tell me if i need to fix something! I don't really proof read these things'''
> 
> Also, the name Bill called Dipper Pinus pumila is a type of pine tree, called the dwarf pine, so little pine... Hahah, get..it...? I'm so very... clever.  
> And the song that is pacifica's ringtone on Dipper's phone is that little excerpt from Nicki's boss ass bitch, that rich bitch part at the end. I don't know why but i just laugh at the thought of him loosing his phone and asking her to call him and just that blasting...
> 
>  
> 
> C/K/B/ETC~~


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The much awaited (well i think it's been awaited?) chapter update! Chachachacha

Dipper ran a hand through his hair for the umpteenth time since getting up, dark circles prominent under his eyes, brushing brunette locks out of his face before placing his seemingly signature blue and white hat on his head. Taking unsteady steps down the wooden stairs, still tired and wanting to sleep more but knowing it was better to wake up reluctantly on his own than get yelled at by Stan to start his morning shift at the Mystery Shack. The teenager pushed himself through the hinged doors that connected the main house to the so called gift shop, seeing Wendy leaning against the counter with a look that he could only describe as being hers. A relaxed expression, lidded eyes that made it look like the ginger would fall asleep from boredom any moment, but the calm and laidback smile that always seemed to tug at her lips when someone was speaking with her.

“And look who decides to join the world of the living!” Mabel spoke, kicking out her leg from the counter a bit as she smiled widely at her brother, her hands spread out widely as she held onto a small rectangular pamphlet in her right hand.

“I am running off of three hours of sleep, cut me some slack alright,” he laughed tiredly as he grabbed a pencil when he walked over behind the counter, poking it persistently at his older twin’s back till she hopped down from the surface with a dramatic sigh, “God I could really use some coffee right now.”

“You always want coffee, because you sure are thirrrstyyy~,” Mabel snickered as she smiled widely with a sly look that shone in her eyes, leaning a bit over the counter at her sibling.

“Oh my God Mabel too early for this bull,” Dipper groaned, running a hand across his face.

The redhead looked down at him with a curious look before looking over to the smiling twin, “Wait, what’s going on? Who’s got Dipper parched?”

“Do not listen to her, she has no idea what’s going on,” Dipper quickly spoke up, looking at the older girl as she snickered as him before leaning over the counter and staring at Mabel with wide green eyes.

“You know that new coffee shop?” Mabel paused as she got a nod from the older, “alright, there’s a barista there that Dipper and him have totally been flirting back and forth!”

“Mabel do you even know what flirting is?? Last time I checked you take two people blinking at the same time as unrequited love.”

“Didn’t you say it’s too early for you to deal with this, so no comments from you and allow _me_ to deal with this, alright,” the older twin placed her hand on her hip and pointed at her younger, clutching the paper tightly as she pursed her lips a bit in a moment of false seriousness before her smile broke through.

“Aw, man, has little Dipper have eyes for someone new? Dude, it feels like ages ago yet yesterday when you were fawning over me,” Wendy laughed as she recalled the first summer the Pines twins had stayed for, “Aww, kinda jealous now, of this coffee shop chick.”

“Jealous?” Dipper awkwardly laughed as he stared at the taller.

She stood back up, despite still slouching she had a good few inches of height on the twins, “Yeah, being crushed on is sorta flattering. And I’m shallow I suppose, I enjoy attention from people. But it’s pretty cute though, you’re a cute kid.”

Dipper smiled nervously, looking off somewhere else as he rubbed the back of his neck out of habit before speaking up and changing the topic, looking at Mabel, “what’s that?”

Mabel looked at her hand where her brother was pointing at, eyes lighting up as she held it up high and jumping into some sort of weird pose with her leg outstretched back while the other was knelt forward, “This my dear bro-bro, is the pamphlet for the annual quilt show!!!”

The two behind the counter shared a bored groan as Mabel stood up again, “Oh come on! It’s really fun and cool! Pacifica won’t go with me though…”

“Yeah, ‘fun’ whatever you classify fun as,” Dipper sighed as he leaned on his elbows.

The older twin pouted as she stared at him, “Oh come on! It’s fun… Well, I think so, and plenty of others!”

“And by others you mean old people,” Wendy tuned in, right as she spoke that their so-called boss and the twin’s uncle stepped into the giftshop.

“What about old people?” his scratchy voice cut through, Mabel turning on her heels to face him, putting on her best puppy-dog eyed look as she held the pamphlet up to her face.

“Those two are being No Fun Nancys, there’s this quilt show, and I have no one to go with, what do you say Grunkle Stan, me and you, two pals on the road, seeing the shows of quilts and the stitch work of masters of fabric, the intercut designs and patterns. And of course all free of charge, the only price? Smiles and a day full of fun,” she smiled widely at him as she waved her hand in the air for emphasis on the final sentence.

The older man scoffed as he walked around her, “You just made quilting sound like some sort of punishment, no. Why can’t you get that blonde girl of yours to go with you instead of trying to con us into going?”

“You should be pleased with my con work, I pick it up from you,” Mabel spoke as she crossed her arms over her chest, “Pacifica refuses to go, I asked her several times and she still says no. Says ‘as much as I love watching you get excited and happy over things this time it won’t be worth a day full of walking around some dusty old museum or whatever and staring at blankets.’.”

Mabel spoke her girlfriend’s words with a perfect posture, stone face, and in some sort of fancier voice to imitate her status.

Wendy swallowed a snicker as she tried to keep a straight face, “I didn’t know Pacifica was British.”

“You know what I mean! And Candy is away this summer at a relatives, Grenda… Well, as much as I enjoy her company I don’t think it’s the wisest idea to bring her to a museum full of trinkets, paintings, and other things that cost more money than I can even imagine… She has a habit of getting too rambunctious,” Mabel sighed loudly as she walked back to the counter, laying her upper half over it with a huff.

“Well you’ll find someone to go with you, are you could always just go alone,” Dipper comforted his sibling as he patted her head without much thought, bringing his other hand up to his mouth to hide a yawn.

“Hey you better not think about sleeping today, we’re supposed to be busy and I need all hands on deck,” Stan pointed at Dipper with a narrowed gaze.

“Yeah yeah, I hear it all the time, I just need a coffee,” the youngest in the room spoke as he moved to get up, being stopped by the elder.

“You’re on shift, Mabel go on a coffee run, alright?” the man’s gaze went to the older twin, her head whipping up with a smile and a happy gasp.

Quickly grabbing a pen and scribbling the requests on the back of the pamphlet and Mabel darted off, slamming through the ‘Employees Only’ door and searching for her small satchel, wherever she had left it. Once she found it she was out the door, darting over to the old Cadillac and manually unlocking the driver’s side.

* * *

 

Mabel opened the glass door, swinging it wide open as she walked in with a wide smile. The bell chimed and a familiar face poked through the back doorway that was behind the counter.

Bill smiled happily as he walked forward, finger gunning at the girl, “Long haired Dippin’ Dots.”

“It’s Mabel,” She corrected him, whether he actually forgot her name or not she wasn’t sure.

Bill flicked the nametag that was pinned to the front of the black collared shirt that was part of his work uniform, “It’s Bill.”

The girl giggled as she walked up to the counter, the tall man leaning on his hands against the surface of it already, “So what can I get you?”

“Oh! Well im getting multiple stuff, so, um here,” She dug around in the satchel before pulling out the folded up pamphlet and handing it to the barista, she herself taking a step back as she looked over the menu.

Bill took the pamphlet, unfolding it and looking it over with a raised eyebrow before finding the scribbled down requested drinks on the back, “A quilt show? They have those here?”

Mabel’s eyes lit up, smiling widely before taking a quick step to the counter, “Yeah! Do you like them?”

Bill walked over to the back counter and began mixing the orders, shrugging a bit as he did so, “I use to go to them all the time as a kid, my mother loved them, haven’t gone to one since though. How long has it been…? I think it’s been about eight years? They were fun, I enjoyed it.”

Mabel squealed loudly, holding onto the edge of the counter as she leaned backwards, her smile wide enough to make her cheeks hurt. Quickly whipping upwards before speaking again, “Do you wanna go with me!”

“What?” Bill stopped what he was doing to look over at her, watching as she rocked back and forth on her heels.

“I have no one to go with, and these things are boring alone, you said you hadn’t gone to one in a really long time! You don’t have to, I just thought it’d be fun, you’re already a fun guy! Well, from what I know, hahaha,” She rambled on as Bill smiled a bit and returned to his work, “Dipper won’t go, says they’re too boring, Wendy is the same way. Even my Great Uncle! He’s old already, you’d think he’d enjoy it or something. But whatever, he’s a weird guy. Pacifica won’t go either. I’m stuck alone, I’m a good person I’m nice I shouldn’t be alone because alone is boring!”

Bill slide three of the drinks onto the counter, smiling a bit as the girl ranted on and on before he spoke up, “Well, why not I have nothing planned tomorrow, and I’m not working. I’ll take you up on that offer Shooting Star.”

Mabel stopped her ranting, looking up curiously at the barista with a smile, “Shooting star?”

Bill gestured to the sweater she threw on this morning, the dark pink that was stitched with a shooting star-like pattern on it, dead center of the front, “You like nicknames, don’t you?”

“Nah, I’m just observant,” he clicked his tongue, “Anything else you’d like?”

“Oh! Yeah, um just a mocha frappe, largest size,” She ordered for herself, bouncing a bit on her toes as Bill moved to make it for her.

The blonde slid the drink onto the counter with the rest, waiting for the other to hand him her card and pay. Mabel shoved the card back into her bag as she placed all the drinks into the holder. While she was putting straws into each of the drinks Bill slide the pamphlet back over to her.

“I’m still new around Oregon, so just pick me up in the morning here, around this time is fine,” Mabel looked up at him, smiling widely as she grabbed the folded paper and the drinks.

“Alright! I’ll see you then, then!” She smiled widely, turning to leave and wave at him. Bill waved back and watched as she left before walking back into the back room again.

* * *

 

“The coffee has arrived, your mornings have been made!” Mabel announced as she stepped in, before he could speak up Mabel smiled, “Don’t worry Soos, we got you covered and got you one too.”

“Yes!” the handyman pumped his fist in the air as he joined around the counter.

“Oh sweet baby Jesus this is what I needed,” Wendy spoke as she grabbed her drink, taking a quick sip of the iced matcha drink.

Dipper grabbed his, twisting it till he saw the scribbled writing of ‘Sapling’ on it, sighing a bit before taking a swig himself, speaking with the straw in his mouth, “What are you so smiles about? Oh God what did you do!!”

“I may or may not have given Bill your number~~…”

Dipper nearly spat out his drink, setting it down in a hurry and digging through his pockets to find his phone, “Mabel I’m gonna need to change my number now!!! What the hell is wrong with you?!”

“Relax! Relax! I wouldn’t do that, it was a joke, but I did get someone to go with me tomorrow to the quilt show!” Mabel spoke triumphantly, taking a step back as she puffed out her chest and placed a fist on her hip.

“Wait, that quilt show that all those old people go to, like, the super boring one?” Soos questioned, staring down at the teen as she slumped forward with a loud sigh.

“It’s not just for old people!!! Plenty of young teens and adults go to them!! But yes, yes that one,” Mabel stepped back to the counter and leaned against it.

“Right, but who did you get to go with you,” Dipper question, his eyes narrowed suspiciously at his sister as her smile returned.

“Just some blonde barista-“

“That’s it! I am banning you from that coffee shop!” Dipper stood on the foot bars of the stool as he tried to tower over the counter, glaring down at his sister.

Mabel simply laughed, “You can’t BAN me from a place you don’t even own, you have no authority over it. And you can’t tell me who I can and cannot be friends with! So ha!”

“Oh yeah! Well I’ll just tell Pacifica on you! She doesn’t like him!”

“Pacifica is on my side! That’s no fair! If you do that so help I WILL give Bill your number! Do not push me Dipper I will do it!” Mabel stood on her toes as she stared up at her sibling, “Might even throw in a rose or something! Say it’s from you! Or I could just give him that mixtape remix of your awkward puberty voice.”

Dipper stared down at her, wide eyed as she mocked and forcing her voice to crack and fall flat. He took in a breath through his nose as he spoke through his teeth, “You wouldn’t dare.”

“Wouldn’t I?”

The two twins stared at each other, the tension high even as Wendy broke it, “So, that’s good that you found someone to go with you though! Bill? Is that his name?”

Mabel continued to stare at her brother, narrowing her gaze as she raised an eyebrow, hands on her hips while she slowly relaxed her shoulders, “Yeah, he’s about your age. He’s a pretty nice guy too, I mean he agreed to go to the quilt show with me, and he actually likes them.”

“Oh wow good for you, just marry him why don’t you.”

Mabel looked back to Dipper as he muttered to himself, sitting back down for a moment before standing up, grabbing his drink before walking over to the rack of postcards. Mabel turned and watched him, “Why would I be the one marrying him, I have Pacifica, but hey. Since you like him so much we can share a wedding date! You and Paz can wear matching dresses.”

Dipper scowled over at his sister, slamming his drink on one of the display tables as he stepped closer, taking in a breath as he got ready to say something before Wendy carefully pulled herself over the counter, “You guys, seriously? It’s freaking 9am, I get it siblings fight but seriously.”

“We wouldn’t be fighting if Mabel just kept her nose out of people’s business!” Dipper quipped, glaring a bit at the gingered girl before back to Mabel.

“Other people’s business?? Last time I checked I’m just making a new friend,” Mabel raised an eyebrow as she stared at Dipper.

“I- you! You keep trying to meddle in my life! Tr-“

“How!?”

“I know what you’re going to do Mabel! You just! You always do this!! Why!?” Dipper raised his voice enough for it to crack just enough for him to recoil a bit at the sound of it.

“What, Dipper what the hell are you talking about? Are you worried I’m going to embarrass you or something?” Mabel scoffed a bit, folding her arms over her chest.

“You’re just gonna sit there and tell Bill everything because you think it’s charming and it’s not and it’s just knock it off!” Dipper ran a hand through his hair as he stared at the ground, knocking his hat askew as he grabbed a fistful of his bangs.

“Dipper. We’re just. Going to a quilt show.”

“How do I know that!? You guys could go gossip or something,” Dipper stared up at her again, his scowl long gone and replaced with worry, staring from his sister, to Wendy and then to Soos and back, “You, you did that with Wendy and the others!”

“Why are you so paranoid!? Are you really that worried? Then just come with us, and you can make sure I don’t, god forbid I tell him that you’re the younger twin,” Mabel unfolded her arms out in emphasis as she rolled her eyes.

“Maybe,” Dipper took in a deep breath and stood up straight, “Maybe I will! Yeah, I think I will.”

“Good! We’re leaving at 9am so get ready before then!” Mabel smiled happily before dropping her expression a bit, grabbing her drink and heading outside, her face now blank “I’m going to help Grunkle Stan with tours today…”

Mabel left the three, Dipper staring blankly with wide eyes at the counter, his body tensed as he shakily breathed through his nose. Wendy and Soos stared at him worriedly, looking at each other for a moment.

“Dude, are you okay?” Soos asked, stepping over to the youngest.

“Yeah, you don’t need to go if you don’t want to,” Wendy pitched in, going over to him. She reached out her hand for a moment before pulling it back and resting it on the teen’s shoulder.

“I’ll be fine, and I’m going tomorrow.” Dipper shakily breathed as he shrugged off the woman’s touch, moving back over to the counter.

Wendy sighed a bit as she grabbed the teen’s drink and brought it back over to him before she herself moved behind the counter with him. She scratched her freckled covered jaw in thought before smiling a bit, “Hey, do you guys wanna hear one of my weird college stories?”

“Oh yeah man! Those stories are the best!” Soos cheered her on and she turned to Dipper.

Dipper crossed his arms over the surface of the counter, burying his face in his arms while his eyes were still visible, staring blankly ahead of him. Wendy rubbed his back a bit before taking off his hat, setting it to the side as she removed her own. Placing hers on his head, covering his eyes as she did so and receiving a snort from the teen. Dipper sat up, adjusting the fur-lined fabric back so he could see. Wendy picked up his hat smiling a bit, placing it on her head with the visor facing backwards.

“Look at that, I’m cool now, I’m one of the cool kids,” She laughed as she made a dorky smile

Dipper laughed a bit as he watched the redhead, “You’re still a hipster.”

“Ah, once you’re hipster trash you always will be,” she laughed as she pulled some of her bangs through the slot above the adjuster, her naturally coppery hair falling in the middle of her face which caused her to blow a puff of air at it in some sort of attempt to move it.

“Hipster lumberjack,” Dipper mumbled as he snorted, watching her mess with the bangs in her face.

Wendy folded her arms across her chest, leaning back against the counter and blowing her hair again as she spoke in a deadpan voice, “I was climbing trees before it was cool. It’s called an ax, a tool you probably never even heard of!”

The two laughed together, smiling as Soos added a comment, “You know what’s weird, there’s probably kids now that actually, like, don’t even know what an ax is. A handheld hatchet even too. What if there comes a time where nobody remembers the ax!”

“Oh my God,” Wendy groaned at the comment, “Now you’re making me feel like I actually am hipster trash.”

“But you are,” Dipper snorted as he pointed it out, Wendy leaning to him.

“Yeah, but people who hang out with hipsters, slowly become one themselves!! Oooo~, soon you’ll start wearing flannel Dipper, and listening to Indie bands! And you’ll scoff at the new age and prefer your vintage vinyl, and beanies, and coffee-OH GOD DIPPER IT’S BEGUN!!!” Wendy shook her arm out of the sleeve of her, ironically, flannel shirt and draped the sleeve on his shoulder, “Oh Dipper no it’s got you!”

“Oh no!! It’s begun, no it can’t end like thisss!! I can, feel it,” Dipper dramatically cough, “Wendy… I need to tell you something.”

“Don’t try and speak! It’ll make it worse!” Wendy pulled her sleeve back on right, “I’m sorry, I made this happen to you!”

“Wendy, please… I.. I need you to know.. I listened to BABBA’s earlier albums… Before it was cool…” Dipper’s voice died down as he laid on the counter a bit, being mostly held up by Wendy.

“Dipper, Dipper carry on my wayward son!!!” Wendy cried out as she held onto Dipper, faking a sob into his shoulder that died out into laughter as Dipper to begun to laugh.

Wendy sat back as she still laughed, Dipper sitting up straight as he tried to calm himself. Smiling for a moment as the two stopped laughing, sharing a gaze and busting out laughing again. It continued for a few more minutes before Wendy spoke up.

“Feeling better?” she asked with a wide smile.

“Yeah,” Dipper spoked as he took of her hat from his head, “Can I have my own hat back now though, you look so weird with it on.”

Wendy mocked a gasp, one hand over her collarbone while her free hand took off the hat and giving it to the younger. She placed her own hat back on as Dipper did so with his. The day continuing on like any other now, but Dipper’s mind continued to jump between going with his sister and Bill and not that by the time the sun had gone down he had even more of a problem going to sleep than usual. Still unsure as he stared at the ceiling of his summer-room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jokes on you Dipper, you grow up to be hipster trASH. I have no idea why but Alex reminds me of a hipster lumberjack and it bugs me...
> 
> THEY WEREN'T SUPPOSED TO ARGUE IT JUST TOOK A TURN LIKE THAT OH MY GOD. Mabel that, i feel like that was sort of manipulative but i don't know. Sorry i feel like i make Dipper a bit /too/ self-conscious and worry about what people think about him and all that but nobody has told me anything bad about how i portray him so i just. i don't know.
> 
> Sorry this took so long to update, i apologize... Hopefully it's not too bad. Uhm, also?? Has anyone gone to quilt shows?? They're fun, i like them. We have at least one that i know if every year and they're so cool.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i haVENT UPDATED IN YEARS!!! i'm kidding it's been months, i'm so sorry you people.. i'm so sorry...

Dipper was lying in his bed, the mess of blankets strewn over him as he held his pillow over his head. Mabel had been up earlier than usual that morning to clean out the car out of habit, the overhead light shining brightly through the room the moment she got up, staying on while she was gone and still on while she got ready. She’d get dressed in the bathroom, or in the closet, but everything else she did in the shared bedroom of hers and Dipper’s. Stan stating that he didn’t want some weird makeup mess of glitter or whatever she wore in the bathroom. She rolled her eyes at this but agreed to keep it to the room. She had her music playing low, but in the sleep interrupted state of Dipper it sounded far louder, it didn’t help that Mabel was humming along to the overly catchy but strikingly misogynistic lyrics.

“Alright Dip, time to get ready,” the older twin’s voice cut through Dipper’s annoyed thoughts, next thing he knew the covers were tugged off of him and tossed to the floor. He simply growled and curled his legs up, pulling the pillow tighter over his head.

Mabel scoffed, rolling her eyes and placed a hand on her hip, “Dipper, you said you’d come with me today, you can’t back out last minute.”

“I don’t wanna go, I just said that in the heat of the moment, besides I was up late last night,” he sighed, his voice muffled.

“You said you’d go and I’m holding you up to that!” the long haired brunette huffed a bit before taking hold on her sibling’s ankles.

Dipper tossed the pillow off of him, throwing it across the room as he began to sit up, “Mabel alright I’m getting up!”

She simply giggled as she yanked hard, taking bare footed steps backwards all while Dipper yanked his legs to no avail. She pulled him off the bed with a loud, and a bit painful sounding thud, letting go of him once he was pulled out of bed to clap her hands together while a smile of triumph crept to her face.

“That hurt!” Dipper glared at Mabel as he blindly felt around for something to throw at her, but finding nothing to his disappointment.

“Oh you’ll survive,” she baby-talked him, turning on her heals to go to her own bed and sitting on the edge to put her knee socks on, “besides, pain is apparently a good awakener.”

“Being startled into waking up can kill you, that’s why I don’t believe in alarm clocks,” he leaned back against the side of his bed awkwardly, “why do we need to go so early anyway, can’t we just go later. Or never…”

“It’s clear in the downtown district, we need to leave early for a lot of reasons,” Mabel slipped on her flats, “And I don’t wanna leave Bill hanging around for a while, I told him in the morning so who knows how long he’d be waiting for us.”

“Wait, he knows I’m going? Is that how you got him to hang out with you by telling him I’ll be there just for you two to pick on?” Dipper stared at her for a moment, caution flashing through his eyes as he watched her move from her bed to the dresser where her hair ties were lying at.

Mabel snorted a bit with an elastic between her teeth, pulling her hair back blindly into a sloppy ponytail, “No, no he doesn’t know. I guess in whatever it is you two are doing you have the slight upper hand.”

Dipper relaxed a bit knowing that small piece of information, it took his sister flinging an elastic at him to get him up off the bedroom floor and to the closet, clicking on the small light inside it before closing the door to get dressed. After that he met Mabel downstairs, seeing how she had already ate he simply shrugged off the morning meal and went to put on his worn sneakers.

“Alright! We’re heading out! See you both later!” Mabel smiled towards their two uncles in the kitchen.

“Alright, alright, and hey! Dipper,” Stan pointed over towards the youngest, “you come back here spouting about quilts, and you will be dead to be.”

“Stanley It’s not even that big of a deal,” Ford stopped what he was doing with a sigh.

But the man ignored his sibling, instead he watched as the two young siblings went out the door, and before the door was closed he threw in another, “DEAD TO ME!!”

Mabel snickered as she dug out the keys for the older car from her satchel, running over to the driver’s side and manually unlocking the car doors. Dipper waiting patiently before opening passenger’s side door and climbing in. He watched as Mabel expertly shifted the stick shift into gear, sinking back a bit as he did when she drove the Cadillac since she was the only one between the two who actually knows how to drive stick. He dug into his pocket to listen to his music, the left earbud out as he mindlessly listened to Mabel talk to him through the short drive.

“What if he isn’t even here,” he spoke up, grumbling mostly as he slouched in the seat with his arms folded over his chest.

“Looks like you’re wrong bro~!” Mabel hummed happily as she let go of the wheel with her right hand and pointed out the window.

Dipper groaned loudly in disgust when he saw the familiar blonde hair of Bill’s. Mabel pulling up to the curb in front of the small coffee shop and rolling down the passenger window, leaning over and smiling widely. Bill was focused on his phone and hadn’t even noticed the car at all. Dipper looked him up and down, never seeing him out of the work clothes of the dark green polo with the company logo on it that was always accompanied with black slacks or just jeans. Instead the man was wearing a layered outfit of greys and blacks, the only color being a maroon loose fitting shirt that peeked through the halfheartedly buttoned cardigan.

Mabel rolled her eyes and finally grabbed his attention, “Yo, coffee boy get me a double macchiato with extra caramel and don’t hold back on the whipped cream!”

Bill looked up at them with a surprised look that quickly faded into a smile, awkwardly bringing his hand up to make sure his bangs were over his right eye as he walked over to them, bracing his hands on the top of the Cadillac, leaning down greatly to speak to them, “Sorry, sweetheart, I should have you buy me a drink today. And a hello to you, Dipshit.”

“I bet you’ve been dying to use that one, haven’t you.”

“Dipper move, let Bill sit up front!” Mabel unbuckled him and was trying to shove him out the door before Bill reached in and locked the door and laugh.

“Nah, he can stay upfront, I need as much leg space I can get and I don’t mind sitting in the back,” the man laughed as he opened the door behind the passenger seat, climbing in and buckling himself. He laughed even more when Dipper pushed the seat completely back in one quick and rough action, clicking his tongue at his dirty given look, “Nice try, Kid, I’m sitting in the middle.”

“Dipper stop being a jerk,” Mabel scolded him and grabbed her small purse from the middle console and threw it at him in attempt to make her point get across.

The drive to the museum was a long one, having the display taking place in several cities over. Dipper mostly zoned out to his own music and texts from Wendy, she was texting during work again and keeping him in the loop of the people watching by snapping pictures of people that walked into the gift shop. Occasionally he’d get dragged into the conversation, sometimes forgetting the man in the backseat and actually being nice before getting reminded when he’d grab the headrest and pull himself to poke his head up to point out something. Dipper would instantly scoff and scoot back closer to the door and earning a laugh from Bill. On more than one occasion when the radio was the only thing that hummed throughout the car Dipper would pick up on the soft singing along, looking over to see Mabel’s mouth curled up in a smile but closed. Looking with the help of his phone’s screen reflection to notice the other male’s lips moving along to some pop song as he scrolled through his phone.

“Oh Dipper, it’s your part!” Mabel snickered when Nicki’s verse of Bang Bang came on the radio.

Dipper instantly told her to shut up as he grumpily pouted as he stared out the window, hearing Bill snort a laugh only made him more upset. Great, now he had some other dumb name to call him once he came up with it.

The car ride was far too long for Dipper’s liking, once Mabel had pulled into a parking spot and not yet even fully stopped he was out of the vehicle. Mabel yelling at him, “Dipper Pine the door does not open until the car is stopped!”

“Ooo, listen to your sister, young man,” Bill teased as he stretched his long legs.

“Mabel, you’re not our mother,” Dipper spoke with his hands on his hips, his glare falling onto Bill, “And you aren’t part of this so shut up, Bildo”

“Grumpy as ever on such a sunny day,” Bill laughed as he walked passed him, resisting the urge to ruffle the other’s dark hair as he did so, “I expect nothing less from you~.”

Mabel locked the car doors and quickly ran up the sidewalk, grabbing Dipper’s arm as she did so before catching up to Bill and doing the same with her free arm, “Come on you guys~!!! I’ve been waiting forever for this!”

“Don’t we have to pa-“

“Nope! Free exhibit, now come onnn!” she cut the man off as she pulled them in through the glass doors and down the small entrance hallway, turning sharply and stepping into a large room.

The walls were lined with quilts that varied in size, color, patterns, the whole shebang. Mabel squealed happily as she continued to pull the two along, giving up and letting them go as she instead tugged Bill along, pulling on his hand hard and accidentally pulling off one of his rings. Apologizing nervously as she handed it back to him as she waved him over to the first blanket. Dipper shoved his hands into his pockets and leisurely walked along one of the other walls, scanning the blankets with a bored expression. He didn’t really see the excitement over all this, they were blankets. Just blankets and nothing really more. He leaned in to read one of the plaques glued to the wall next to a forest embroidered quilt, his eyes widening in shock as he saw the selling price. Shaking his head to himself as he took one last look at it before moving to the next. They were all beautiful, he’d give them that, especially for being hand sewn, but he wouldn’t pay more than $50 for a blanket, no matter how nice it was. His attention was caught by his sister, looking over to see her dramatically hanging off of Bill’s arm as she squealed loudly, her voice echoing throughout the room as it turned into a giggle. He snorted with a roll of his eyes, moving on to another room away from the two as he pulled out his phone to text Wendy.

_‘Why did I agree to go on this stupid trip again.’_

_‘becuz Mabel tricked u into it?’_

_‘You should see how she’s acting…’_

_‘Like Mabel?’_

_‘She’s hanging off of him and giggling like she’s twelve again’_

_‘Sounds like her’_

_‘Yeah but you’d think they were dating or something, it’s weird and annoying. This whole trip is annoying, Bill is annoying. I could be at the shack, sleeping, or watching tv.’_

_‘Or actually working?’_

_‘Says the one texting behind the register.’_

_‘Touché’_

He snorted to himself in a laugh before looking up from his phone, seeing Mabel pull Bill down the two steps into the room. His smile dropped instantly as he shoved himself off the wall, burying his phone into his pocket as he quickly exited the room with an annoyed expression.

“Oh wow! Bill look! This one has galaxies on it!” Mabel pointed to the wall where the quilt in mention was hanging.

Bill didn’t look as he watched the younger twin angrily leave the room, his gaze narrowed at him till he was completely out of view. He whipped his head back with a wide smile as he hummed, “Oh hey cool, I guess you could say the quilt is, out of this world.”

Dipper growled loudly in annoyance as he could hear the loud laugh from Mabel all the way down the bricked hallway, wishing he had worn a hood or something but instead put both of his earbuds into his ears and scrolled till he found a song he liked. Turning sharply down a small hallway lined with large glass bricked windows and small pictures he didn’t care about, heading straight to the very end of the hallway to the small loveseat and lounging on it, taking his phone back out and replying.

_‘Ohahhahahaaa, Mabel have you forgotten about Pacifica?’_

The time between the reply took longer than he was expecting, closing back to the home screen to play a game to pass the time. He was choked a startled screech when he felt a hand on his shoulder, staring up with wide eyes expecting to be yelled at by some employee telling him he can sit here. His deer-in-headlight look faded and was replaced with an annoyed expression again as he ignore Bill, going back to his game and music.

Bill rolled his eyes and yanked one of the earbuds out of his ear, “Pin-head, come with me.”

“The hell I am, Billard.”

He rolled his eyes as he crossed his arms over his chest, “Look, you look bored, come on, there has to be something here that you enjoy.”

“Not being around you is a pretty fine enjoyment,” Dipper didn’t even have time to give him a mocking grin as he was tugged up by his wrist, “Dude! Knock it off! I’ll scream, I’ll scream so loud it’ll make you head spin too!”

Bill bit back the urge to make an inappropriate comment, instead he let go of his wrist and turned with a smile, speaking in a soft calm voice, “Look, you just seem bored. I’m trying to help, alright? If you give it a try and you don’t like it, then you can come back here and sulk around being bored out of your mind.”

“There’s nothing but the dumb quilt exhibit here,” Dipper rubbed his wrist.

Bill simply chuckled and gave him a wink, well what Dipper assumed to be one seeing how he only had one visible eye. The man walked the rest of the way down the hallway and turned in the opposite direction of where he came, Dipper deciding to follow him several steps behind him. Watching his every step, every leisurely relaxed saunter down the hallways, every turn he took till they reached a spiraled staircase with a large thick velvet rope blocking it off, the laminated sign zip-tied around it read in large, bolded capslocked: Exhibit Closed.

Bill looked around before easily stepping over the rope, smiling as he waited for the younger to do so. Dipper stared at him with a confused look, chewing on his lip as he himself looked around and weighing his choices. He slipped his phone into his pocket and draped his headphones around his neck before he crouched down and crawled underneath the sign. The man’s laugh seemed to be one of encouragement as he raced up the concrete steps, how he did so in silence wearing creepers was beyond Dipper.

He waited at the top for Dipper to come up behind him, when the teen did he spoke in a whisper, “This best not be a trick to get me in trouble…”

“Would you relax,” Bill spoke happily as he began to wander around the upperfloor, “I’m not a brat like you. And if you get in trouble so do I, I’m up here with you.”

He rolled his eyes, “Right. Well whatever. What is even up here?”

“The normal exhibit, usually they have both floors with paintings, but since they’re so focused with making sure the quilts stay nice they can’t focus on two floors at once. So they blocked this one off,” Bill waved him down a hall that was filled to the brim with local artist painting.

Dipper walked slowly down the hall as he looked over the paintings as best he could, his eyes were wide as he did so. Some were portraits of people or the artist themselves, random still life of books and desks. Another artist focused more on the wildlife and nature to paint, a large grassy meadow with a lone standing elk on the edge of the tall trees of the forest. He had to resist bringing his hand up to touch the painting, that’s all it was… A painting. But it looked so real, as if he had to keep quiet and hold his breath or the animals would scurry away. His attention was grabbed when the floor creaked loudly. Looking over to Bill he was waved over to another room with Russian art.

“Not sure if you’re an art person,” The man spoke softly, holding his wrist behind his back as he walked into the room lined with more paintings, “But I enjoy it. I like history, I like seeing is captured. Photography, journalism, paintings, that sort of thing I find fascinating.”

Dipper listened to him, walking close by as he continued to stare at the largely portioned frames. His eyes scanning over the pale faces that captured so much emotion that he could feel what was trying to be expressed through the paint, whether happiness, sadness, fear, excitement, or whatever else, “What room is this about?”

“It’s mostly the Eastern Front and Soviet life, capturing the depression and fear of it all throughout the war and aftermath,” Bill explained and watched the younger, “They’re all the same artist in this room here, he was very passionate about the rest of the world seeing what was going on. He risked his own life painting these, capturing the daily lives of people just like him.”

Dipper hummed, haven’t noticing that Bill had stopped walking and running into him, “Watch it.”

“You should be paying attention,” he couldn’t help but smile down at him, watching him go back to being defensive, “What kind of art do you like though, they might have some here.”

“I don’t know,” Dipper’s voice was mumbled, he wasn’t really educated in artists outside of the more popular ones. Van Gogh, Picasso, Da Vinci, Michelangelo, the ones taught in school, “I like, I enjoy nature and junk like that mostly…”

Bill just smiled and leaded him out of the room, the floor continued to squeal and creak uncomfortably beneath their feet as Dipper followed him down the hallways. The older of the duo peering into room after room before looking back to the other with a wide smile, waving him into the room.

Dipper followed nervously, carefully stepping into the room and his eyes lighting up as he was greeted with paintings after paintings of various nature scenes. Lakes, meadows, trees, skylines, even the ocean. His dark eyes flickered from each one before he found a familiar waterfall, and for some reason it excited him as he smiled and pointed over to it, “Hey! That’s the falls! From back in town!”

Bill couldn’t help but smile at his smile, oh God… Was that gay? Fuck… Shit, that _was_ gay… Shaking it off he went to go up and look at the painting with him, examining the fine details of it all. Out of all the rooms on the floor the nature paintings was what they looked at the most. Dipper studying each of them for minutes before the next. They were able to look through a handful of rooms before they were stopped dead in their tracks.

“Excuse me, sirs, you’re not supposed to be up here, the exhibit is closed,” A woman spoke up, her hair pulled back in a messy style as she stared at the two.

Dipper stared wide eyed at Bill as he stood straight and smiled at her, “Oh, is it? Well, would explain why the lights are off, haha! I’m sorry, we must have missed the signs, we’ll leave right away.”

Before the woman could speak up again, Bill had taken Dipper’s hand in his own and pulled him quickly down a hallway to the stairwell. He covered his mouth from laughing at the shocked and worried look the younger had when they were caught, trying desperately not to snicker and was able to swallow it down. Reaching the bottom of the stairs he let go of his hand, holding up the rope for him before walking underneath it after. Dipper laughing a bit and in turn go Bill to laugh, turning the corner to the main lobby to find Mabel sitting there.

She quickly stood up from the bench and rushed over to them, “Oh my God! There you two are! Bill you ditched me, I expected that much from Dipper, but you too? That’s so mean… Where did you two even go?”

“Ah, I’ll make it up to you,” Bill ignored the last question though, walking and leading the way out the museum, “I’ll buy you guys lunch, besides it’s the least I can do. How about that?”

“Oh no, Bill I can’t let you do that, I invited yo-“

Dipper elbowed her none too secretly, smiling widely over at her, “If the man wants to buy is lunch, let him buy us lunch. Come on, Mabs, it’s the least you two can do, you both owe me one for dragging me along.”

Mabel hummed as she walked around the car, Dipper walking over to the passenger side and smiling a dagger up at Bill as he whispered through his teeth, “It’s the least you can do, mister ‘we won’t get caught’.”

“Oh hey, you enjoyed yourself, but whatever,” Bill spoke with a sighed smile, climbing into the backseat and waiting for the twins to decide on where they were going to make him buy them food at. They spent a good five minutes sitting in the parking lot before they finally agreed on something.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What a weird place to stop at, but whatever, next chapter they'll be eating lunch at i just didn't wanna drag this out too long. Really quick update (finally)
> 
> Point out spelling errors -finger guns- because im a piece of shit that never proofreads anything B^)

**Author's Note:**

> So, each time i make a post on my tumblr, about Dipper which i usually type Dipper Pines because of the chat option and it's just dumb thoughts, but someone. There is always, ALWAYS, one person that'll reply back to it saying "i read that as Dipper Penis..." So i kinda just got this dumb thought in my head after the last time this happened, so yesterday or something.  
> My internet was out for most of the day, and it came back on in the later hours, so now i can research for my next fic, and then i'll be all caught up with things awaiting to write aside from chapter updates (hint hints at you to prompt me or something idk)  
> Also, sorry for shitty writing in this one, i never really went back to proofread but then again i never do, i just sorta rushed this one.
> 
> Comments make me so happy, really they do i read them over and over again through out the day they make me smile.  
> C/K/B/ETC


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